Whiteness: A Comparative Study of the U.S. Occupations of Haiti and the Dominican Republic

This semester at Virginia Tech, I am in a class that has been studying the history of the Caribbean. The history of this group of islands is incredibly complex. From the moment Europeans discovered the “New World,” the Caribbean has been wrought by hegemony and the capitalistic motivations of imperial powers. Typically regarded as merely a vacationing destination, this narrow, western characterization of the Caribbean falls miserably short of the true nature of the region. Our final assignment in Dr. Hidalgo’s “History of the Caribbean” class is to create a piece of public history, in order to display an authentic segment of the rich history that exists in the Caribbean.

With all that being said, this blog post is about "whiteness" and its affect on western decision making, specifically during the United States’ occupation of Haiti and the Dominican Republic. By “whiteness,” I mean a socially constructed phenomenon that has been established as the racial standard in the Western World. Race is a constantly evolving characteristic of class and social stratification. The effects encompass a large spectrum that range from the justification of prejudice, to the definition of beauty. The concept of race is fabricated and has no objective reality; yet it affects almost every part of the world we inhabit. Whiteness has been glorified as the archetype of humanity, as well as the subject of pseudo-scientific research and the eugenics movement. The point I am trying to get across it this: Whiteness, insofar as my research concerns, is far more than skin color, it is shorthand for something much larger.

“Whiteness” permeates the island of Hispaniola. White privilege existed on Hispaniola far before the United States occupied the island in the early 20th century. In fact, racial polarization began on Hispaniola the moment the first Europeans stepped foot on the island during Columbus’ famous voyage in 1492. However, the U.S. occupations of Haiti in 1915 and the Dominican Republic in 1916 solidified the racial identities of the two nations as well as racial hierarchies within each country.

Whiteness was largely the determining factor for how the United States handled the occupation of each country. It affected how U.S. troops viewed and treated the people, the types of public works undertaken, and he ways each country was governed. A comparison of the U.S. invasions of Haiti and of the Dominican Republic uncovers two differing American objectives predicated upon whiteness. In Haiti, the United States saw a black nation with a history seeped in slavery and revolution. Consequently, the United States wanted to create a docile, subservient, black nation. In the Dominican Republic however, the United States identified a nation with a strong desire for development; a nation that could be made white. While Americans did not view Dominicans as white, they did see the possibility of ‘whitening’ the country. Through the occupation of the Dominican Republic, the United States wanted to create a more advanced, pseudo-white nation, capable of self-government and modernization. The Dominican Republic could not be white, but it was far closer to whiteness than Haiti.

This distinction between Haiti and the Dominican Republic can help explain U.S. marines’ actions after the invasions. Many of the marines hailed from a Jim Crow South ,noted for lynching African Americans. In Haiti, there was an incredible amount of unnecessary bloodshed. Newspaper headlines describing the state of the Haitian occupation exclaimed “slaughter,” and “shameful abuse of power.” On October 15, 1920, The New York Times published the writings of “Henry A. Franck, the noted traveler and authority on the West Indies” and his report of:

“How American marines, largely made up of and officered by Southerners, opened fire with machine guns from airplanes upon defenseless Haitian villages, killing men, women and children in the open marketplaces; how natives were slain for sport by a hoodlum element among these same Southerners…"

Marines in the Dominican Republic did carry out thoughtless acts of violence against Dominican civilians, although not to the extent they did in Haiti. Moreover, unlike in Haiti, the United States went to great lengths to cover up or deny the violence when possible. When confirmed cases of injustice or maltreatment of nationals became public, the Military Government heavily punished the perpetrators. “Black” Haitians could be lynched with impunity, while “pseudo-white” Dominicans, connected to international media could not.

The education systems implemented by the occupation forces mirrored the segregationist schooling in the US. White Americans applauded Booker T. Washington for championing industrial education for African Americans. Liberal arts education would be reserved for whites. Similar policies were followed on the island.

In Haiti, the education system was eventually remodeled in 1922, seven years after the initial invasion. The Americans emphasized vocational and agricultural education, while Liberal arts programs were eliminated. Gendarmerie Commandant Butler summed up the ambition of the U.S. in Haiti when he said the goal was to “make Haiti a first class black man’s country.”

The United States followed a very different plan for the Dominican Republic. There, the military government quickly undertook a plan to overhaul schooling industrial education took a back seat to the main objective, of eliminating illiteracy. In the eyes of American officials, the possibility of the Dominicans becoming more “white” gave them privilege to legitimate education. Haitians, mired in their blackness, were expected to simply develop economic skills.

Many other aspects of the United States occupations of Haiti and the Dominican Republic, reveal the influence of whiteness, the perpetuation of whiteness and the western concept of race, as well as played -and one might argue continued to play- a crucial role in informing western decision-making and international policies. I am exploring many of these aspects in my senior capstone research paper. Please, if you have any input, questions, thoughts, or ideas, post them in the comments section. It may really help me as I enter the final stretches of completing my paper.

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this post,
Merry Christmas and God Bless,
John Carr

Bibliography

Calder, Bruce J. The Impact of Intervention: The Dominican Republic During the U.S. Occupation of 1916-1924. Austin: University of Texas Press, 1984.

Calder, Bruce J.. “Some Aspects of the United States Occupation of the Dominican Republic 1916-1924.” PHD diss., University of Texas at Austin, 1974.

"LAYS HAITI KILLINGS TO SOUTHERN MEN." New York Times, October 15, 1920.

Painter, Nell Irvin. The History of White People. New York: W.W. Norton, 2010.

Renda, Mary A. Taking Haiti: Military Occupation and the Culture of U.S. Imperialism, 1915-1940. Chapel Hill: University of North Carolina Press, 2001.

SCHMIDT, HANS R., JR.. THE UNITED STATES OCCUPATION OF HAITI: 1915-1934. Ph.D. diss., Rutgers The State University of New Jersey - New Brunswick, 1989.

Welles, Sumner. Naboth's Vineyard The Dominican Republic 1844-1924. Vol. II. New York, New York: New York Payson & Clark Ltd, 1928.

Issac Nagle Holding it Down

I sit here in the B apartment in my bed, overlooking the vast wasteland that has become the Willard complex. The sky is grey, but there is no rain. The parking lot is filled with debris, newspaper, some sort of weird glitter, and random pieces of costumes from Hallowillard. Its terrifying. On one end the old basketball goal sits crooked with an old bike tired hanging from a string tied to it, while on the other end the skate ramp is filled with pine needles. There is no one to clear it. Everyone is gone. And the scene is like a bleak, post-apocalyptic wasteland.

It happened about four days ago now. On Thursday night the Virginia Tech Hokies won their final home game of the year against the Univerity of North Carolina Tar Heels and ever since then people have started to disappear. Not many at first, but one by one they all left until it was only me. A man alone with his thoughts. And his smartphone. With an eTrade app.

So upon entering this new world I try and find companionship. There is a possum who lurks around these parts, occasionally digging in to our trash when I leave it out. While we once were enemies (I've tried to kill him unsuccessfully many times), we now realize that we only have each other. What once started as a malicious dual of man vs. nature has now turned into some sort of ultimate bond between friends. Our lives depend on each other. I've named him Owen, and now he is all I have.

In this blog the gentleman of the house usually give you an update on the whereabouts of each other. For now I can only give you the last known locations of the men of B. Mike Lewis was to go on a missions trip to Haiti, but his car is still here, so he must have walked. Atta boy Mike. Brendan O'Connor had tickets with his family to see Cirque dul Soleil, but since he hasn't returned I can only guess that he joined them. John Leonard was last seen packing two guns into his car and driving off into the sunset. He must have known the apolcalypse was coming.

As for the rest of the apartments and the house, no signs of life have been detected. I've broken into A twice to reset their internet router, and the boys of C lock their house up pretty tight, so their was no getting in there. The house boys must have dissipated right out of nowhere because all of their glasses are still left on the porch, about thirty in all.

So now as I carouse around this vacant wasteland I can only hope that this is all some sort of dream and that come one day soon (Sunday perhaps) I'll wake up to find all of my dearest friends back home with me. Then I will yet again be able to have Old Testament talks with Joe Danehower and the other house gentleman. I'll be able to get medical advice from Dr. Sweeney. I'll be able to watch the boys of C pwn some n00bs on MW3. I'll be able to shoot things off the deck with the boys of B. What a beautiful day that would be.

But seriously gentleman, I love and miss you all and can't wait till you get back. I hope your break is spiritually refreshing and that your time with your families is great. The gift of community that we have here is unreal and I think I take that for granted. It becomes much more obvious when we aren't in it though. Like a fish out of water eh? Anyway, love you dudes a lot.

The Last Man Standing,
Isaac Lane Nagle III

P.S. The men of B, I asked Owen the Possum to move in, I hope that's alright. Mike, I put him in your room. Be careful though, he doesn't love to be surprised. He also hogs all the blankets.

HaloWillard 2011

What comes to mind when I think "October"? I'm glad you asked. Yes, it is a month, so that is probably the first thing I think of. But secondly? HalloWillard. An event greater than Halloween. And it's two days before, so you know it's better. But just saying that probably won't convince you, which is why I decided to make a Top 10 Reasons to Come to HalloWillard List.

1. Live Music. Where else are you gonna listen to two spectacular singers for only $2 in one night?

2. Costumes. Everyone loves getting dressed up like witches and other crap like that. So we're gonna let you wear whatever costume you want here. You're welcome.

3. Sam Bowman is gonna be here. He's super good looking.

4. Leland Pearson is dressing up like his look a-like Mr. Tumnus. Don't act like you've never seen the similarities. Slap some horns and hooves on Leland and he could star in the upcoming Chronicles of Narnia movie.

5. Petting Zoo. This isn't a joke. House resident Evan Underwood is currently in the process of locating small animals to be present for a petting zoo. We've procured chickens, ducks and possibly a small goat thus far. We are in the market for a donkey.

6. Fun games. Pumpkin bowling? Super creative.

7. A special appearance by Gus Chiggins. Who doesn't love an imaginary prospector showing up and leading everyone in a a round of Square dancing?

8. The great outdoors. It's in the parking lot, so you can breathe all the fresh air you want.

9. Issac Nagle is going to dye his hair red for this event. Whaaat?!

10. There are gonna be baked goods! You can even bring some!

If those aren't ten good reasons to come from out of town to see this event, check out this video which will make it all the more clear...

If Walls Could Talk...

To: Current Residents

Boys, you know I have been around a long time; a long, long time. In fact, I’ve been in this same spot probably since your parents were kids. Sure, I’ve had a few facelifts over the years: you guys with the paint two summers ago, and when the landlord decided to go crazy and refinish the floors, but I’m basically the same house. And that’s why I’m finally speaking up. You guys are animals. I’m an old man, and you’re kicking the crap out of me. Therefore, I’ve put together a small list of grievances, in no particular order, of things that you have done over the past two years, which I would like to never take place again. Also, there are a few that I can deal with, just treat me a bit more gently when doing so.

1. Using the hallway as an archery range. It was bad enough last hunting season when Evan would go kill deer and then bleed them out and skin them in the driveway. Sure, it’s asphault, but how would you like me to pour deer blood down your arm? Not very much. So this year, I had a sneaking suspicion that the compound bow he brought back would bring bad tidings. And I was right. I don’t see one of you standing at the end of the hall way having arrows shot at you. And you know why? Because it’s not fun. You literally shot the arrow completely through the wall. And what if Jeremy had been in bed? You would have killed him, or at least injured him profusely. You’re idiots, don’t do that anymore.

2. The writing of cute little quotes on the wall. John, I know you’re all artistic and whatnot, but every single time you read something you find vaguely motivational, try to hold back from whipping out the paint marker and writing in all caps. I know tattoos are hip and all, but as stated, I’m an old man, and it’s just tacky. I do enjoy when visitors sign their name on the stairwell though in sharpie, it tickles a bit and makes me feel popular and whatnot.

3. Hygiene. This one should go without saying, as you’re all not four years old anymore, but really? James, your feet smell like rotting meat. Get some odor-eaters or something stat, or your shoes may disappear for good. And that’s just to start with you. I haven’t even brought up your gas and sweat. I’m surprised girls even look at you, let alone date you. I feel pity for her when she comes over, clean your room, do your laundry and wash your feet. Sam, you need to wash your hair more than once every two weeks. I know, I know, you don’t like how it fluffs up after you wash it, but I gurauntee you that your girlfriend will like it better when it doesn’t smell like greasy dog.

4. Leaving food out. Remember that time you left the salsa bowl on the counter for a month and a half? That’s not sanitary. You would eat dinner, with the old salsa just sitting there on the table, turning black and smelling. I know you could all smell it, and am sincerely amazed at the amount of effort you put into not cleaning; which brings me to the dishes. Seriously? What the hell. There is never a reason to have over forty cups lying around the house with varying amounts of water in them. This isn’t the movie Signs, Joe will never need to “Swing Away” and water-allergic aliens will never attack. I’m 80% sure.

5. Lighting random items on fire. I’m not sure what most of you know about chemistry, but Sam you’re a biology major, you should definitely know better. Plastic, photographs and other miscellaneous trash that you find does not need to be burned on my front porch. It singes the roof for one, and also all of your children will probably have a third arm from the plastic fumes you inhale while giggling.

6. Breaking glass. Evan, I know you love eating popcorn. And not the toss in the microwave kind either, you love eating the fresh kernels that you cook on the stove in oil, and then put your special popcorn salt on. And that’s cool my friend, real fresh. But there’s a clear and present danger every time you do. You are the definition of the term butter-fingers. As the number of glasses, bowls and plates that you have dropped and shattered on the ground grows swiftly, please take heed of my warning. Dry your hands. Don’t absentmindedly carry mason jars in your greasy paws.

7. Soccerball through the window. Sam, you are a soccer star. I know. You are the all time leading assist leader still at your alma mater. However, I am not a soccer star. I don’t have legs you see. So when kick the ball against the front of the house, don’t get all pissed when I “miss” the ball and it goes straight through your window. I am sorry about the glass shards which covered all of your clothes. My bad.

8. Fireball in the fireplace. I’ll admit, the fireplace is made for fires to be in. However, the purpose is to make the lodge warm and cozy during winter nights. The purpose is not to throw lighters as hard as possible into the flames and make them explode into a fireball that licks the ceilings and floors and almost singes off Jackson’s eyebrows. Dangerous and stupid. Oh, and change the batteries on the smoke detectors, because those obviously don’t work.

9. Climbing on the roof. I have a few issues with this. First of all, safety. If you’re gonna climb on the roof, you should buy a ladder. Your stingy selves decided to build one. That is idiotic. Secondly, my roof should have been replaced about 3 times at this point. It has not been replaced, because Mike Powell doesn’t really think it is necessary. So when you have a cookout to start off the year, and there are 40 people up on the roof throwing frizzbees and taking long-distance corn-hole shots, you’re playing with fire (not literally like the fireballs, but you get the point) The creaking you hear is not me enjoying myself. It’s groaning with the weight of lives in my hands.

10. Clean the chimney. It’s been years, and that’s the reason the house smells like burnt newspaper whenever you light it up. Also why the lodge fills with smoke. You guys are just too lazy to really care. Again, check the smoke detectors.

11. Couches everywhere. Do you need to have this many couches. Yeah, you have friends who visit and stay the night. No one needs this many couches. I think you probably have some you don’t even know about lying around. For example, the one in the back basement room. No one has entered there for about 3 months. That loveseat is a breeding couch for mice at this point.

12. Killing of mice. I applaud your effort in the war against mice (WAM). But there are much simpler ways of killing them. After you catch them on the sticky traps, don’t just launch them into the road, or stomp on them. Or cut them with a machete. I should’ve called PETA a long time ago, but you took out the house phone and keep your cells on you at all times. Except for Sam, he loses his in one of the 18 couches every 5 hours. But it’s that new iphone and I can’t figure out how to work it. Technology…

13. I miss the Willard street sign on the stairwell wall. I hope you learned your lesson about letting cops into the house. In this town, if you are in college you are always the culprit, whether you invited them in to investigate a robbery or not. I liked that sign covering the hole in the wall (from moving an unnecessary couch) and it pissed me off when that cop took it. He had no right to steal our stolen property. Well, maybe he did, but I can promise you that sign sat in his backseat for about a year before he just threw it away.

14. The amount of bikes locked to me. I understand 7. That number would correlate. But how in the world did 12 bikes end up in various places and states of disrepair around me? The beach cruiser is half buried in the backyard under the mini-ramp. The earth decided to reclaim that one. As is the Mongoose in the tree line separating me from the neighbors. I have watched the vines slowly choke the life out of it. The goose is no longer on the loose.

15. Repair my locks. You would think when you got robbed you would say to Mike, “Hey Mr. Powell, I know you thought we were joking before when we said that we don’t have keys to any doors in the house, but we were being serious. Could you replace the locks?” Instead, every night the front door hangs open and the side door is jammed shut as tight as you can, due to it being too large for the frame. I didn’t like when those hooligans robbed me, but I thought well maybe something would finally be done about the locks. It was not.

16. Bosom floods when it rains. Another thing to alert the landlord to. It’s funny that you call the back basement room the bosom, I agree. But when it’s filled with an inch deep of nasty water after it rains, it doesn’t feel good. It’s like Chinese water torture for me.

17. Joe and Sam’s makeshift soundproof wall. You two geniuses really went out of your way on this one. The basement is loud. Understandable. There’s no door to your room cause it’s at the bottom of the stairs, your decision. The fact that you ordered sound proof foam and attempted to design a makeshift entrance out of it? Unrealistic. I have heard James’ snores just as much as you guys have. Believe me, there is no material on earth that can block that roar from drilling into your ears.

18. Jackson’s Justin Bieber music in shower. He sounds like he is a 12 year old girl going through puberty. How you enjoy a song that says baby nigh a million times is foreign to me. So how bout when your dancing around singing with him, you turn it down a bit. I mean, geez. Even I have good taste in music and I was around for the disco era.

19. Hulahoops in trees. Not really something you guys did, but the fact that 4 hula hoops have been hanging in the trees surrounding the house for over ten years brings new meaning to the word “unconcerned”. How did they get up there? No idea. Apparently a strong throwing arm with the wind at your back. But please take them down. I feel like I’m surrounded by a rundown amusement park.

20. Clean the deadly bathroom mold. You guys are in college. Living it up, being young men and all that jazz, but this is a serious health issue. For me and for you. There is deadly mold growing in the bathroom. That happens when there is that much wood exposed to open water for the past 40 or so years. It is the reason you cough so much, and also the reason there is black stuff in the cracks that you see. It is not paint.

21. N64. Two points on this. One, even I know that N64’s are technologically obsolete. Secondly, there is absolutely no reason for being that angry over a loss in SuperSmash. Don’t throw the controllers anymore, or yell profanity. And James stop talking in that weird voice to Joe whenever you beat him. It creeps me out.

Now don’t get me wrong boys. I really do love you living here; makes me feel young again. And I am thankful for a lot you have done. The killing of mice, the time you scared that skunk out of the basement (how he got in there I still don’t know…) and the bright yellow surfboard hanging on the front porch which declares my name. John’s artfulness really came in handy there. Just treat me a bit more gently ok? It would be a lot better for both of us.

Sincerely,
The Willard House


P.S. There’s asbestos in the walls… sorry.

Music Monday (back from the dead) featuring Jimmy Fitch!

Jimmy Fitch

I know it has been quite a while since music Monday has existed… But here it is! This weeks featured artist is country music singer-songwriter, Jimmy Fitch. A few weekends ago, a bunch of friends from Chesapeake were in town to celebrate an engagement. The Friday night before the celebration, the Willard porch was bumping. At one point there was like 30 people gathered around our broken patio furniture sitting and laughing. We were all having a great time, and then, there came Jimmy Fitch. Jimmy showed up covered in mud and grinning from ear to ear. He politely introduced himself and explained that he lived across the street and wanted to introduce himself because he always sees us out on the porch. Somehow in conversation, Jimmy revealed to us that he was a country singer. Suddenly two guitars appeared and before anyone knew what was happening, Jimmy was singing away. Hours passed, and by 2am, there were three guitars and a mandolin being strummed on our porch. And to top it all off, Jimmy is sick at harmonica. We sang along to famous country songs, some of Jimmy’s own songs, and a whole slew of Young Life club songs. It was a beautiful thing. 20 grown men belting out Free Fallin’ at 2 in the morning is not at all commonplace. Thanks Jimmy, for an awesome night. The Willard House (or surfboard house as he called it) will certainly never forget it.

Check out Jimmy Fitch’s facebook band page (http://www.facebook.com/jimmyfitchmusic) It features some cover songs as well as originals. My favorite is one of Mr. Fitch’s own songs, entitled “On the Road.” It features some well-written lyrics, good ole country twang, and Jimmy ripping on the harmonica. Jimmy is a country music singer-songwriter with an incredible country music voice. I wouldn’t be surprised if we hear Jimmy on the radio some day. Also! Hopefully Jimmy will open up for Bison (http://www.facebook.com/Bisonfolk) at Hallowillard Hoedownween this year.

Speaking of which, its on October 28^th this year, and everyone’s invited.

ABP

I apologize for my absence from the blogging world for so long, school, work and young life are all in full swing, which means I am a very busy beaver. Such is life though, and that does not excuse me from not writing on the blog. My sincerest apologies.

Anyhow,I figured I'd let you know a bit about my job at Au Bon Pain, Virginia Tech's premier chain dining facility and coffee/pastry expert.

I work Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays from 6:30- 11:00 a.m. I am a stock boy. Or what I like to call the BigShow. I keep ABP running. Without me, that place would be in shambles. I stock the shelves, carry the half and half, and spend a lot of time in large, walk in freezers. Very dolly intensive. Personally, I think I was selected for this job due to my large muscles, which are so visible through even baggy clothing. Or, it could just be that they needed someone to help unload Soy Milk at 6:45 in the morning. I guess we'll never know.

I work with two pro-stockers. Ryan and Greg. Ryan is an 8th year at Virginia Tech. It's true, he decided to take the rare 3rd victory lap. In actuality, due to some academic difficulties, he had to leave school then come back and now works 5 a.m. to 2 p.m. full time, while he finishes out his degree in Ocean Engineering. He has an earring, and likes to put me in uncomfortable situations with fellow employees. He thinks it's very funny, and I sometimes let out a feeble giggle as well.

Greg is the other pro-stocker. About 52 years in age if I time things right, he graduated from Rutgers with a degree in film, and then moved around the U.S. working for different hotel chains at conferences. He was the guy in charge of setting up everything, doing interface and such stuff. But he got sick of moving around everywhere, and wanted to be closer to his mom, so now he's here.

There are some other interesting characters at ABP. Kevin is our baker. I found out today, he finished up his doctorate in Zoology last year, and his father is the head of The Humane Society. Like the large overarching society. But for now, Dr. Kevin is content to get up early and bake delicious breads, before he moves onto a career in zoology.

Duck is a 65 year old dude who helps make portions in the morning. He is really funny, and always tells me I need to be more irate with my job when unloading boxes. He then tells me to kick some boxes around, and waits patiently until I kick the side of a box. Then he says atta boy, I feel good about myself, and he goes outside to smoke a pipe on his break. That's correct, a pipe. Where he keeps it, or how he has time to smoke a pipe while working, are beyond me.

So that's a brief glance at AuBonPain. The heart and soul of Virginia Tech's dining. May your coffee always be hot, your sandwich always freshly made, and your mac and cheese always creamy.

<3's
James Harris III

A Day in the life of Evan Underwood

yip yip.

I've awoken in the woods. Again. When this first started happening five years ago, I was afraid I was some kind of werewolf. Then I realized that in actuality, my body loves being outside, even when sleeping. Since then, several nights a week my body tip toes off into the woods by itself, in direct contrast to my waking wishes. I've woken up in my back yard now more times than I can count. When back at Willard, my sleeping body takes me up the hill under the big tree by the Summit. Once, I somehow situated myself in with a herd of deer. They took me in as one of their own.

School's been in session for a few weeks now, and I've been adjusting to my new schedule. This summer, I was used to waking up around 5 a.m. to drink coffee and reflect on nature. The school year changes things however, and now I am able to sleep a little longer; I get up at 6 a.m. to do my usual bird watching and recording.

Instead of all 8 a.m. classes this year, none of my classes start till 11 or later, so after I get up at 6, I really don't know what to do with myself. I get some work done, go lay in my bed some, read, go off and be mysterious for a bit, then finally go to class.

I have class from 11- 7 everyday.

After class, I go home, lay in bed and crack open a nice cold coke. I sip on my sweet beverage in a pink SouthernTide Koozie (http://www.southerntide.com/products/Koozies.html) and listen to some of John Carr's music. I go out on the porch, whistling softly to myself an earthy tune, and indulge in good conversation with my house mates.

Then the fun starts. I whip out my brand-new, Diamond Dead-Eye Compound Bow. I've set up a make shift range behind the apartments, with my target a few feet in front of the fence separating us from SigEp. You may be thinking, "But Evan, what if you miss and one of the arrows flies and hurts someone in SigEp's boisterous backyard?" Well my answer is in two parts my friend, firstly I never miss. Secondly, when I have shot over the target, on purpose, and then lost my arrow, on purpose, in the backyard of SigEp; I have never heard any complaints from them, nor hurt anyone. Plus, since Sam won't let me shoot towards his car anymore, where am I supposed to practice?

I disappear for a few hours now, and it is midnight. I make my way into the house, unbeknownst, and slip under my covers. I set my alarm for 6 a.m. and dream of finches and other native birds of the Appalachia. Beautiful.

A Day in the life of Sam Bowman

Ahhhh. Coffee. Some say it's tough to warm my heart. But that is because they've never been around me at 7:15 a.m. M-F. A nice warm cup to get me nice and ready for the commute to Roanoke. This Summer I've been working for a research lab. Studying the Blackfan Virus. Highly Dangerous. Just like me. I leave the house and go to campus to get on the commuter bus that drives out to Roanoke daily. Saves me gas, and I get to watch an episode of Dexter. I finish up Season 3, just as the bus pulls into my stop. I walk into the building, put on my lab coat, and quickly get to work. Measuring, diluting, spinning, weighing, experimenting. You name it, and I probably do it around this place. Some call me a scientist. I call me a magician. I can do things with beakers you can't even imagine.

I get home from work around four and go read The Hunger Games on the front porch of the Willard Home. I enjoy these books immensely. What is in District 13?

After an hour of that it's time to fire up the grill. I take out some fresh meat, still bloody from where I shot and killed it, and cook it. Then I eat it. Without a fork. Cause I'm a man.

After dinner I hang with Norty and Kyle a bit. Joe's studying or lifting weights, and who knows where Jason is. But I content myself with lively conversation with my two buds. Kyle is from Texas. He works with grass. Norton is an engineer. He works with plastics. They're his specialty.

I get on the phone for a bit with Eliza. She talks to me, saying that she's pissed James hasn't written a blog about me, as I am easily the most entertaining and easiest person in the house to write about. I calm her down from her fury and tell her that I am probably the hardest to write about, A. Because I have no really weird qualities besides not showering for James to parody, and B. because although James would love to just fill the entire day of my life with pun references, he's not very good with them. I guess he's just not very punny.

I lay down in my basement/lair bed and curl up under an old, soft quilt I stole from one of my roommmates. I ponder things aloud for a bit with Joe, our nightly pillow talk. Then as my eyelids begin to close, I think of one more pun to say. I try to open my mouth to say it, but dreams of science and manliness whisk it away....

Year Two

Well my friends it is almost that time again. The smell of Fall is in the air. In come the freshmen with their crates and their multiple microwaves, their cheap area rugs and crafty picture frames, all in an attempt to make their 7 by 8 ft dorm room seem a tad bit more like home. Unfortunately, it never really loses that "prison-esque" feel that schools go for. Unless you live in PY, in which your walk in closet is as big as some other freshman's entire room.

Anyhow, I would like to list the top ten things The House is excited for this year, as chosen by me. 10 being least excited, and 1 being most excited.

10. For more quotes to be written on the walls of our home. I think every member of the house enjoys dabbling in this from time to time. From small smileys to slanted quotes, to entire-wall-covering quotes by nuns.

9. Watching Jackson get in physical confrontations with other Willard members. He isn't the most physically imposing man ever, but he is lithe and quick like a cat. His preferred fighting options are; 1.running quickly and throwing random objects behind him. 2. The Turtle: curling up, keeping his head down, and waiting for the moment to be over.

8. Virginia Tech Football games. They're fun, exciting, and filled with friends. Also, there's a small chance we might get to play Miami University's intramural championship flag football team the way things are looking right now. And that'll be fun.

7. The Willard Fish Fry. Evan and Norty cook up a ton of delicious fresh caught fish on reading day second semester. Yummy.

6. Being upperclassmen. No longer are we freshmen (thankfully). Or even sophomores (again, thankfully). Instead we are in the 50% of Tech that laughs nervously every time someone brings up that soon we will be going over the top into the real world.

5. Mice-killing. I know this one sounds strange, being in front of the fish fry, football, and not being freshmen. But it turns into a rambunctious sport in Willard, with casualties on both ends. (15 mice dead, Jeremy with a bit finger)

4. The huge amounts of cookouts to start the year. Every organization seems to think "why not be ultra-uncreative and have a cookout just like every other on campus organization? and it'll be free!" So, we here at the house get to enjoy the fruits of this and eat for free as much as possible.

3.John's graduation party/turning 21. Tears will be shed. But it will be enjoyable and a celebration of his life at Tech. Also, we get to be fully adults this year. Unless you count renting cars, and you have to be 25 to do that.

2. Hallowillard. Frocketed shirts going on sale soon. Come get you some. Its gonna be huge. (the event, not the shirt)

1. Being together. One, big, all-male family.

A Day in the life of Jeremy Mateyk

6:00 a.m. I wake up and the first though through my head is thanking God I'm not a southerner. This thought lasts for approximately 5 minutes

6:05 a.m. I take a shower and quickly get dressed in my uniform for work. Khaki pants with a brown belt, a light blue collared shirt with a picture of a baby on the front pocket, and elbow length rubber gloves. I ride by bike to work with the rubber gloves on, gets my fingers used to the feeling for the day.

7:00 a.m. I arrive at work (long bike ride), I put on the regulation trash bags over my shoes and make my way down to the experimentation room. This Summer, I am working for Johnston and Johnston baby company. I work in the Vaseline and lotion department, also known as the big show to the other guys in the company. My job is a fast-paced one. I am the man running the direct experiments on children. Every twenty minutes a new baby is brought to me. I take them by the ankles and rub Vaseline or lotion on their palms and bottoms of their feet and knees. I then see if they can crawl without slipping and sliding. Once my bit of fun is done, I do the actual experiment and rub lotion on their forehead, and then ask them a series of questions about how it feels. I've yet to receive a verbal response, but the company tells me that my work is vital to the success of its new "Infinity" line of baby lotions.

12:00 p.m. Lunch break. Finally. I peel off my gloves and leave them at my work station. Then I head down to the lunch room. I take my brown-bag lunch out and devour it's contents. PBJ. Mmmm. I wish I had D2 right about now....

12:15 p.m. back to work.

5 p.m. I clock out and start the long ride back home. Luckily, its all down hill so I make it quickly back to my west chester abode.

5:05 p.m. I walk in the door and see a smorgesboard of treats that my father has left out before me. Meats. Cheeses. Cream Puffs. A bowl of Hershey's syrup. Grapes. Strawberries. Graham Crackers. You name it, its probably on a platter before me.

6:00 p.m. I go and read for a long time. And not just any book. The Bible. The Holy one.

8:00 p.m. I go on a three-way skype sesh with the Mikes. We do this every night. Great friends aren't just there during the school year. We chat about our days, and about acapella and stuff. Then we tell each other goodnight and climb into bed.

10:00 p.m. I am in the bunk beneath James's. He is fast asleep already so I listen to his breathing while I stare at the Ferrari poster taped on the bottom of his bunk. So much power. So much speed. Beautiful. Someday, I won't be lotioning babies anymore. Someday, I'll be a star. Someday, I'll work for the BMW Mountain Bike division. It will be glorious.

oh man

Hey guys, breaking radio silence to say that I stinking miss ya'll. Reading the recent posts (hilarious, by the way) a little bit of tears came out of my eyes. Mostly from the hard laughing, but some too from love. I haven't really felt alone on the trail, because the Lord has been with me and I'm not the only thru-hiker. But I just miss my brothers.
I'm in Maine now, and I plan to summit my last mountain of this long haul next saturday (30th). Then the real adventure begins: the rest of my life. I think I'll start by coming home to the burg, finding some sort of job, and spending a lot of time with this particular girl I think is cute. Seeing as I am currently homeless, I would like to crash at the house a few nights in August (1st, 9th, 10th, 11th), if that would be cool. It sure would be good to see you guys.
I'll bring a picture of me standing next to a sign, if you know what I mean.

A Day in the life of Joe Danehower

3:00 a.m. Mmmm Protein. A lot of people wonder how I keep my body in peak physical condition at all times. I tell them the three p's: power, persistence, and protein. Power: lifting, running, homework. Everything I do, I do powerfully. Persistence: Go hard. All day everyday. Protein: pretty self-explanatory. I intake at least a 100 grams of protein every 3 hours to keep my body working at 100% (see persistence). That's why I wake up at three a.m. every night; to make myself a whey protein shake.

6:00 a.m. Breakfast time. Meat. Peanutbutter. Protein shake.

6:30 a.m. I start getting ready for my classes. Lemme tell you right now, summer session is exactly as rigorous as I thought it would be (see power). I'm taking a few engineering classes, and spend almost every other waking hour at the church where I work, or doing homework.

6:55 a.m. I ride my bike to class, and get ready for 6 hours of boring lectures.

9:00 a.m. leave class for a "bathroom break" (see protein).

1:00 p.m. Out of class, I ride my bike over to Mccomas for a brief lift (http://www.menshealth.com/fitness/muscle-building-11)

3:00 p.m. done with my lift, eat a power bar and drink two protein shakes. I ride my bike back to my house, and get ready to meet with some of the guys from church tonight for a Bible Study in the basement. I pass Jason playing supersmash bros on the Nintendo when I walk in. I haven't played in a few months. The last time almost ended in bloodshed. James kept making jokes and Sam, Jeremy, and Jackson had to hold me back after I threatened to break his neck with my bare hands, and then advanced to do so. I figured some time off of the N64 would be good. James sure can get my goat...

4:45 p.m. I start picking up some guys for Bible study/ dinner.

6:00 p.m. everyone is at Willard for the meeting. We break some bread and then get into the Word. We finish up around 8 p.m., and the guys all head home.

8:03 p.m. I pass Sam in our basement bedroom, and make a quick Bible jokes. He has a quick giggle and then heads outside to grill up his dinner. Everyone loves my Bible jokes. Especially Doug, which is one of the reasons I'm glad he's staying in Blacksburg. When the other guys don't pick up on my Old Testament jokes referring to Habakkuk 3, he always can. (see persistence)

9:00 p.m. just finished talking on the phone to my girlfriend Claire for the past 45 minutes. I miss her so much. A single tear slides down my cheek. I wipe it away quickly so the other guys can't see... then I eat more meat (see protein)

9:30 I get into the word by myself and have a great time with the Lord, over a PBJ sandwich. Afterwards, I do some more homework for tomorrow, and get ready for another Summer day in Blacksburg.

12:00 My alarm wakes me up, time for one last PBJ of the day. (see protein)

The Old BMS Reborn/ Alex Norton is famous.

As many avid followers of this blog know, The Willard House is located pleasantly on Willard Dr. (Coincidence?) in Blacksburg, VA. Though known for their fine Farmer's Market and slow moving road maintenance, Blacksburg has never been known as "progressive" or "maintained". But all of that is about to change. Though the town has made us put up with eyesores for years, (Old BMS, Busted down BHS, abandoned business on Main St., etc.), they're finally doing something about it. Due to a Facebook Status Update from current Willard Summer/Full-time resident Joe "DADDY" Danehower, it came to my attention that...

1. The Old Blacksburg Middle School is being torn down and being replaced with a hip and trendy new shopping/residential area.

2. Alex Norton looks super good on tv.

That's right. No longer will Willard residents and friends have to stare down the old school building on their way to visit. Instead, they may take a walk in the park behind our house, or even go shopping at a local store. Additionally, Alex Norton (Resident: Willard APT. A; Willard Summer House/Plantation), got to talk on the local newscast about the way these changes will affect local renters. You know what that means. The Willard House was on the news. If you go to 1:51 in the following video, you will see the right corner of the house, and the window to Sam and Joe's basement getaway.

http://www2.wsls.com/news/2011/jun/21/1/blacksburg-middle-school-update-90383-vi-28250/

Willard Plantation.

Just went to the river, James and Jeremy were visiting!

Left to right, Jason, Norton, Kyle, James, Me, Jeremy.

Not shown, Joe... he's somewhere doing homework.

Well, after another long respite I have decided to once again blog. As the only active blogger (3 posts to my name) currently living in the house this summer, I feel it necessary to update everyone of the going-ons in Blacksburg.

With warm weather comes not so much rain and almost no wind in Blacksburg, which may come as a surprise to many of you Hokies out there. It has been quite pleasant in fact. You may have noticed that the name of this blog is "Willard Plantation". This is because we have some changes in the House this summer and some of us thought it appropriate to temporarily nickname the House. If you take a look at the top photo you may glimpse a haphazard "Plantation" written on a piece of cardboard stuck onto the surfboard hanging from the porch. We all agreed on a temporary name change, however discussions of adding a Confederate or "Don't Tread On Me" flag are ongoing. Anyways, with Evan being a jerk and dropping out for the summer to live in dumb Charlottesville, Joe and I remain the only full-time members of the Willard House currently here for the summer. However, in the offseason, we have made some trades that, overall, Joe and I are quite pleased with. The new residents of the "hipster room" (John and Evans room of course) are two strapping men by the names of Jason Popp and Kyle Lamers. Both are of substantial size and are as tall as James, but with slightly more muscle. This, along with the presence of Jacked-Joe, has proved to create the most formidable Willard to date. In the apartments, a sole resident remained for the summer; Alex Norton. He frequents the house and is considered an honorary member for the summer. Let me give you a low-down of everyone you don't know.

Jason Popp.

Jason is a fun-loving, sarcastic, Richmond-born gentleman. He enjoys fishing, sitting on the porch, and playing Zelda and Mass Effect II. This current occupier of John Carr's bed prefers a classis look of white t-shirt, cutoff black jhorts, and black slipons. Jason is a master of accents and impressions, and is constantly quoting things for all of our amusement. Every weekend is sure to hold a trip to the River for the Plantation, and Jason is our fishing guide; supplying lures and baits, and teaching us what type of cast and area is appropriate to fish. As you can see above, he has an incredible level of expertise. Jason is currently taking a class for the summer at VT and enjoys the most free time of any of us. Jason loves to push your buttons, and it may be annoying, but once you get past it, he is one of the most caring people I know. Love you buddy

Kyle Lamers.

Kyle Lamers is our new Jeremy. It's not because of his imposing physical stature or slight resemblance to a bear, but rather his role in our jokes. Without Jeremy and James there has been a significant drop in Northerner jokes at the Willard Plantation. Luckily, Jason has taken up the mantle and proceeded to make many comments about Kyle being from Texas. Yes. Kyle is from Texas. Taking Evans bed, Kyle has graced us with the Willard House's first piercings. Eyebrow and ear rings make this rosy-cheeked beast look terrifying. But, if you can get by those formidable Texas fronts, you will find a man with beautiful green-gray eyes, a love for eating out at restaurants (which him and I do about three to four times a week... see image)

and a tendency to play the worst Super Smash I have ever seen. Kyle is in Blacksburg this summer because he has a job with VT... looking at dirt. That's right folks, Kyle is a construction site inspector for VT facilities department... I guess that's the sort of thing people in Texas consider fun... weird. Love you too buddy.

Alex Norton.

When searching for picture of Norton I noticed a surprising amount of manly photos, and I was impressed... touche Nort. Norton is a calm and reasonable man unless it comes to NASCAR or the Steelers. Norton is taking time this summer to enjoy the simpler things in life; playing Red Dead Redemption, brewing his own beer, and perfecting the art of fishing. Kyle, Jason, Joe, and I are all going to be Juniors, but Norton will be a senior and he is loving his summer in Blacksburg. He is currently working at a company in Roanoke as an intern engineer. Alex is Greek and the infamous unblemished lamb of the Willard compound. If you you have never met Alex he can be summed up thus; a kind and gentle soul. Love you also buddy.

Joe Danehower.

Does homework all the time.

For a more visual display of shenanigans please add Jason Popp as a friend on Facebook and see the album Plantation Life, or go here http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150279312802184.378045.644177183.

-Sam

A Day in the life of Jackson Strawn

7 a.m.

I hit the snooze a couple times this morning, and got up around 7:35. I would've hit it again, but while getting out of bed to get the alarm, I tripped over my huge, zebra pajama pants and fell to the ground successfully waking me. Another beautiful morning in Michigan. I walk into the bathroom and consider brushing my teeth, but I did yesterday so I deem it unnecessary. At this point I grab the Word and go to the front porch of the cabin with my snack. I love my morning snack. The day isn't complete with out it. I then pull on my attire for the day. A baggie shirt that I got for free somewhere, and slightly tight tye-dye shorts. Then some long, white, slightly dirty socks that I feel naked without. Now only one more fashion statement before I look straight goon. I grab my ratty sneakers from under my bunk and make my way to the club room.

Camp is just becoming alive at this point, a group of campers is up playing Frolf. I could easily beat them, but decline their shouted invitation to join. I've been known to chuck a solid bee, but there's time for work and there's time for play. So in about an hour I'll go play by myself. Glorious. I grab a cup of coffee on the way to the sound booth and say hit to the techs. They're gon gon wit da gon gon so it makes my job that much easier, if you know what I'm sayin. Today is the Timber Wolf Volleyball Tourney, but I don't have too much to do- the stand is already set up by the vball courts. I wander aimlessly for a little while and try to take a quick nap to no avail. Fortunately, I downloaded an episode of the first 48 last night, so I keep myself occupied for 22 minutes or so.

Time comes for the tourney, so I grab a few bees and begin to chuck at the mob assembled in front of the stand. These teams need their chips, and I relish power that comes with my position. After the volleyball is over, campers head to lunch so I take a quick dip in the lake by myself to cool off. After my shower, I jump on the scale real quick to see what the champ himself is weighing in at. Still 120 pounds, soaking wet. Beast!

I go and play a few rounds of Frizz with some s.s. bros, and then go back to the sound booth to get ready for club. This board practically runs itself, though I am afraid that it will short out with the amount of sweat pouring off my palms. Club runs smoothly, as usual with me in control, and I go to help with the next event.

After the day is done, around 11:00 I go on a walk with miles for miles, to chat and catch up. Little did I know that our walk was gonna last over 30 minutes though! For my body to run at maximum efficiency I like to get at least 8.5 hours of sleep, plus periodic naps throughout the day. I wish there was some DX for me to munch on right now to right this chemical imbalance. Oh well, sacrificing for the gospel. I get back to my bunk around 12:30 and can't believe I am still awake. I am losing my mind. I get out of "my uniform" and slip on my comfy-never-been-washed pajama pants. I feel like I'm on the African Sahara every time I slip into their endless depths. Beddie bye for Jackson. Again, I pass on brushing my teeth as sweet thoughts of soccer, beanies, and mountain dew bounce around my head.

A Day in the life of John Carr

5:45 am.

That's when I wake up every day. I don't work till 8 am. Just in time to get a good gnar sesh in before stocking shelves at conner's a local grocery store. I roll out of my bed and walk into the common space of the small apartment I share with PJ, Eli and Charlie, the three guys I'm doing ministry with this Summer in Hatteras. I walk into the the small half-bath and rub some water on my face and brush my teeth. I then rub my hand through my hair a few times, just to get it right at that "my-hair-looks-great-but-its-long-and-I-don't-care-how-it-looks" way. Then I walk down the stairs, grab my board (it's named ShreddyMac), strap it to the top of my purplish-plum le sabre, and head down to the ocean.

What a sesh. There musta been a couple 20-footers out there. I wish James was here, he woulda loved destroying those bad boys with me. James loves to surf as well, and I'm almost as good as he is. He coulda shown me the ropes there a couple times, I got a little scared. Now it's off to stock shelves for a few hours, before heading to my second job; Foster Boats- a boat repair place on the island. Real rough dudes work there. They all speak with these strange pseudo-australian accents. But I like them. And they like me. They call me crazy carr. It's a sign of affection among these roughnecks.

What a day. Done with work by 4- just enough time to go and shred more. Got a barnacle in my foot. Ouch.

I head back to the house, cooked up two Ramen noodle cups for dinner, aka living the high life. I usually only eat one, but after so much surf, the fake chinese food does me good. I walk onto the front porch and sit there for a while, reading and relaxing. Watching the sunset. Then I walk inside and put on some music that you probably haven't heard of. It's called Seven Swans Started Out With Nothing. It's a folk/reggae/hardcore/jazz mix. Evan would like it.

Tonight is the night where we open up the skate park on the Island. Every kid is here, from 7th grade bros to toocoolforschool 12th graders. But we let them all in. They love it and I have some sweet conversations with some of the dudes.

Once we close down the park it's about 11:30. That means it's only 8pm over in Kansas, where my long-time girlfriend Stef lives. She's the best. We have a quick skype sesh, about 3 and a half hours, and then I go to bed at 3. Up in less than 3 hours, to do it all again.

"A Cast of Characters"- Featured Blog

This blog was written by our very own Doug "Monroe" Clelland. He decided when he left for the trail not to contribute to the House blog anymore, and started his own called There.
This is one of his posts from early May, that I think everyone will enjoy.

Here's a rough sketch of the people I have been with on this journey:

"Circuit Rider", "Sherlock", and "Hopeful" along with "Last Minute": These guys were on top of Springer Mt. with me at the beginning. I didn't know them then, but got to know them over the first week. All of them thru-hiked in '03, and the first three are doing it again this year. Last Minute was along for the first week to see them off. They are all older than me in varying degrees.
Circuit Rider is 50some. His trail name is derived from the old Bible-belt preachers who would 'ride the circuit' preaching at a different church each week. Circuit Rider and Sherlock have thru-hiked 6 previous times, this one will make 7. They do it as a ministry opportunity, to share the gospel of Jesus. It's a pretty good idea, seeing as people are so open on the trail. Circuit Rider took my picture on Springer, and I'm glad that he did. He's a boss.
Sherlock is the youngest, something like 31. He likes to read books by christian authors, and talk about what he has read. So he told me about things that he has read when we were hiking a piece together. Also, Sherlock has a girl back home, so we bonded over what it is like to hike and try and get phone service so you can talk to a special female. Sherlock was keeping his budding relationship secret from his hiking partners, except for Circuit Rider, because Hopeful and Last Minute would make fun of him if they knew. They did find out while I was with them, and didn't seem to make fun of him. All the same, though, when we were at Neel's Gap Outfitter he pulls me aside with "Hey Brown [that's what I was going by back then], I have a secret for you." Turns out he had gotten phone service on the previous mountain and had talked with his girl. He was excited.
Hopeful is in his 60s. He fought in 'nam and didn't go crazy from it, but a lot of his friends did. I consider Hopeful a gentle and quiet man, because he is, but he can talk for a long time about any subject you get him started on. Circuit Rider and Sherlock will tell you if you ask them that they are hiking in order to share the gospel as the opportunity arises, along with the personal adventure of a thru-hike. Hopeful is doing the same, but would probably never tell you that. He is one of the most authentic brother in the faith. Seriously, if I can know Jesus the way it is evident that this man does, that would be sweet.
Last Minute was a section hiker, so I hesitate to include him in this list, but here he is. Last Minute got his name because when he thru-hiked in '03 he got his gear at the last minute, caught his flight at the last minute... He said the name chose him.

Justin a.k.a. "Blaze": I met Justin my first night on the trail. Going around for introductions he said his name was Justin, "My name is Justin, I like that name." He was being a little defensive because everyone else had made up names. That cut to my heart though, that he liked his name. That night I said to myself, "I like my name too, I don't want to take a made up name." So I chose Monroe, my name but also distinct enough from what people call me at home to be playing alone with the thru-hiker name game. When I last saw him, Justin was toying with the trail name "Blaze", which I thought was fitting because of his blaze orange hat that he wore almost constantly in those early chilly days, and because he likes to smoke weed.

"CrazyLegs": CrazyLegs is from Florida. She started out "FancyPants", but decided that she is not that fancy a person (she's not) and that she wanted to pay tribute to the legs that are going to get her to Maine (they are really long, she's a tall one) so she changed her name. This meant that for the next few days she had to fight the improper name and name combinations, like "FancyLegs", "CrazyPants", and "PantsLegs". Eventually the new name stuck.

"DreamBeliever": DreamBeliever is an older woman who had recently had a serious car accident. This accident, which reminded her that her life will not last forever, inspired her to go after her lifelong dream of thru-hiking the AT. Unfortunately, there was serious pain in her shoulder from the accident which made carrying a heavy backpack not so cool, and she fell a few days in and thought that she added a broken rib to the mix. She went home, and is the only person I have known who has done so.

"Cotton": Cotton was a funny farm boy who got made fun of for having cotton clothes on the first day in the rain. Some people call cotton the 'death fabric' on the trail, because if it gets wet and it is cold you are in more serious danger of hypothermia than you need to be if you were just wearing something else. Cotton was cool, I hope he makes it all the way.

"Infidel/Doc/Boozer": This guy is/was a military man. His attempt in '03 was cut short by getting called overseas, so he is back to do the whole deal this time. He chose the name Infidel from his time spent around Islam, and because he classifies himself as a pagan. Changed this to Doc when it was a more natural name to be called (I think this means he was a doctor in the military). Then, on the first day, he picked up a fallen water bottle and thinking he had just scored some free water went to drink the contents when he had a bad surprise. You see, a lot of hikers carry denatured alcohol as a stove fuel, which looks just like water. Also, a lot of hikers carry this fuel in old plastic bottles, because these are cheap and lightweight containers. This one had x's on it, but Doc took this to mean that it had already been filtered. You can't drink denatured alcohol. Hopeful said later that day that we should rename him Boozer.

...more to come, stay posted...

We miss you Doug! You can do it!

Shorts

For the past 10-12 years of my life, I have worn Cargo shorts.

Cool, stylish, and great for carrying lots of candy; cargo shorts always helped me out when needed. From formal, khaki cargoes to informal navy blue cargoes, I always had a pair that was ready to go, any time.

This past semester has been rough on every pair of shorts I own however. As time goes on, I grow taller, and naturally, my waistline starts to grow (in perfect proportion to my height)a bit. This has made my cargo shorts worn down, and at the end of the semester I noticed that every pair was either missing a button, or had a hole directly in the crotch from where my thighs rubbed through the shorts. (I have extremely large thighs.)

In addition to these disturbing happenings, I was informed a few months ago by my roommates that cargo shorts are no longer "cool" or "hip". They said that a fraternity had gone so far to ban this type of outerwear (article on cargo-ban)John said that I looked like a "pocketed idiot". Jackson cackled softly, and Sam broke it to me gently that cargo shorts were out, perhaps permanently. So now, three months later, I have done something about it.

I was sick of wearing shorts with holes in the crotch. I was sick of not having buttons, and my fly always coming undone. I was also sick of being the butt of everyone's cargo-jokes. So I went shopping the other night. With a J.C. Penny coupon in hand, and determination in my heart, I went shorts shopping. And I ended up with the bad boys you see in this blog. Salmon. Un-cargoed. A size above what I wear, so I have a bit more room in the waist in case of growth. Broish.

I hope your happy world/willard. You've broken my cargo-spirit. I now will wear these normal, unblemished shorts as long as possible. If cargo shorts ever do come back in style though, I will be ready and waiting to sew up a few crotches, attach a few buttons, and pull those pocketed dreams back up where they belong.

I hope this is the last time I have to say some of my clothes have gone out of style. I mean what's next, I can't wear my trucker hat anymore?

<3's
James C. Harris III

Summah 2011

It's been over 2 weeks since anyone has made a post to the blog. This I believe is due to a mix of apathy and being away from each other, but I see it as my responsibility to go ahead and liven things up with a classic plans blog. I will now give you http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifa brief synopsis of what is happening with all the guys this Summer break.

Jer "The Bear" Mateyk
After spending the last semester racing formula one cars for the Virginia Tech Formula One Team, Jeremy will stop this work for the Summer and finally do what he really loves- baby lotion. Yes, yes Jeremy will be working for Johnson and Johnson this Summer. Here's a link to their website... I recommend going there, there's a picture of a really cute baby on the home page (surprise!). Jeremy will also be spending time with his brother James (great name) and fulfilling a multitude of Northern stereotypes that I allude to frequently.

Sam Bowman
Returning home for a few days before heading off to work in Blacksburg, this young man filled up with some of Nancy's fine cooking in his brief hiatus from the burg. Sam will be conducting research on the brain this summer, as he hopes to someday be a neuro-surgeon. Working with one of the top neurologists in the world, it is likely that Sam will in fact be able to hold a human brain in his hands, while it is still connected to someone. He will be assisting in multiple surgeries, and possibly performing some.

Jackson Strawn
Jackson's in Michigan this Summer, a place only a northerner (Jeremy..) could love. There he will be working with sound equipment and stuff, hanging out with Miles, and wearing lots of tye-dye, as it is required to be worn a few days a week (hippies). Jackson misses the Willard house dearly, and I am writing this prediction blog on his request.

Joe "Daddy" Danehower
Joe Daddy will also be spending the Summer in Blacksburg with SamBow. When asked for his plans for the Summer, Joe replied, "Working out... oh other than that? Hmm... Working at a Church, Grilling, Tanning, and visiting Claire. Oh and possibly Yoga, but most likely not." Well, there you have it, straight from the daddy's mouth.

John "no-longer-angry birds" Carr
This Summer John will be traveling to "Hatteras" where he will have a "job" working in a "skate-park". If you wish to know more about John's plans for the Summer, look at the blog directly before this one, where he states in excruciating detail his plans for the summer. It's not really that detailed, but you'll get a good idea what he's doing.

Evan "Environment" Underwood
Evan will not be staying the Summer in Staunton, but rather in the ghastly location of Charlottesville, VA. Here, he will be seeing the sights and also working for a construction company working on dormitories. Evan is no day laborer though, no sir. He will be helping with pretty much whatever they want of him, from working directly, to supervising, to planning. Some would call it an internship. I know I would. Evan will be staying at 316 in the Ville I think. Possibly not though, there is a chance that he will make the short commute from Staunton everyday. I really need more information...

Doug "Beard" Clelland
Hiking.

James "Good-looking" Harris
I'm back in Chesapeake, where I've been hanging with my mom a lot, and also with the guys that live at the Orphanage. No work really yet, I ended up not getting an internship that I wanted, and now am working at the Y again, which is cool. Unfortunately, summer camp doesn't start till June 20th, because the small ones don't get out of school till then. Cool.

Well my friends, that is all. I hope you enjoyed reading it more than I enjoyed writing it. Till next time.

<3's
James C. Harris III